5 Things I LOVE about the Dentist

I was greeted by the receptionist who seemed nice enough. I found this office by an advertisement I received in the mail. It seemed harmless enough to just go and get a cleaning. Little did I know it would turn out like this...

5 Things That Annoyed Me Most:

1. The woman who cleaned my teeth had an ear piece on (actually everyone did). While she's jamming the motorized toothbrush in my mouth she's laughing obnoxiously to whomever is on the other end of that ear piece. She doesn't just do it once, mind you, but over and over her cackling continues until all I want to do is grimace, stick my fingers in my ears to deter her annoying laugh, and yank that "high-tech-thing" out of her ear. Whew! She's not finished yet. She...

2. Scrapes my exposed root with the "silver-hooked-terror-tool." Searing pain explodes in my mouth, after I had previously warned her about how painful it can be. A few minutes later she brings in the dentist, only to inform me that I have a cavity. Oh joy! I get to have a dentist drill my tooth!

3. While I am getting my cavity filled the assistant to the dentist is holding the suction tube near my face. She puts it in my mouth and proceeds to jam the thing against the left side of my tongue. The "suction thing" sucks my tongue until she can pry it off. She doesn't do this once or twice but, no joke, over ten times! Ridiculous! Never in all my years at the dentist's office have I had some moron stand there, trying to use suction, only to have my tongue forcefully follow it everywhere she yanked it.

4. While the dentist is drilling my teeth I could still feel pain, even after the TWO Novocaine shots.

5. And to top it all off -I had to ASK for my free toothbrush.

I don't want to go to the dentist for a very, very long time.